JCVD MARATHON MICRO REVIEW

15 06 2009

jean-claude-van-damme-g

18 Van Damme films in just over 2 weeks. Its about two thirds of all the movies he has done from earliest to latest. I would have loved to watch all of them, but I was already starting to get mixed up with some of the movies so I thought I’d better do a quick summary whilst I still have Jean Claude fresh in my mind…

No Retreat No Surrender (1986)

This is the first movie he was in that really mattered. He played an evil muscle, had next to no script, and got kicked in the ass by the young lead actor who received training from an imaginary Bruce Lee. Contains some awkward scenes of innocence that are pretty wrong.

No-Retreat-No-Surrender-1986

Bloodsport  (1988)

The movie that made JCVD a cult hero. Here he goes and enters a no-rules martial arts competiton and beats everyone up in honor of his adopted master. He also makes friends with a goofy American fighter and gets lucky with a reporter. Probably the best display of Van Damme’s fighting skills in any of his movies.

Bloodsport-1988

Kickboxer (1989)

Na-Ku-Sau! Jean Claude takes revenge for his brother who got his head kicked in because he was too cocky. A fitting follow up to Bloodsport and is highly entertaining.

Kickboxer-1989

Cyborg (1989)

Cheap-ass post apocalyptic beat-em-up which centers around the hunt for a cyborg who holds the key to the survival of earths population. Very b-grade even for its time. Still watchable I guess.

Cyborg-1989

Wrong Bet a.k.a (Lionheart)

He deserts the French Foreign Legion to make his brothers funeral in the US. Shit on luck and with no money, he ends up getting into illegal street fighting and ends up taking revenge on the thugs that killed his brother.

Lionheart-1990

Double Impact (1991)

JCVD plays himself and his identical twin separated at birth and somehow reunited 25 years later to take violent revenge on their parent’s killers. The bump on his forehead is unforgivable.

Double-Impact-1991

Universal Soldier (1992)

Terminator-esque sci-fi blockbuster where human-made cyborgs get violent and take over. Van Damme actually shines in this as Dolf Lungdren is the bigger bonehead.

Universal-Soldier-1992

Hard Target (1993)

Here he gets hired by some chick to find her father’s killers. As always, he finds them, beats them and kills them. This also happens to be director John Woo’s first film.

Hard-Target-1993

Timecop (1994)

‘Time Travel Cop’ who fights crime in different dimensions to prevent catastrophic changes in the present.

Timecop-1994

Street Fighter (1995)

Based on the ever popular Street Fighter II video arcade game. The best fighters from all over the world fight each other for supremecy. Also stars Kylie Minogue.

Street-Fighter-1995

The Quest (1996)

Probably my least favorite Van Damme movie. Too little action and too much of him trying to act. I have a feeling this was supposed to be a kid’s flick.

The-Quest-1996

Double Team (1997)

Stars Dennis Rodman. I thoroughly enjoyed the first half of this movie. But it seems that the last half had been rushed through. The ending was a little bit of an anti-climax. But good to see Dennis Rodman in a movie even though he cannot act at all.

Double-Team-1997

Legionnaire (1998)

A professional boxer who is on the run joins the French Foreign Legion and ends up being the sole survivor of an attack by Arabs. Not bad for a JCVD movie that doesn’t focus on his martial arts abilities.

Legionnaire-1998

In Hell (2003)

JCVD ends up in prison for taking out his wife’s killer. He adapts to life behind bars becoming a fighter in the wardens corrupt institution. Fairly predictable and almost painful to watch Van Damme get beat up all the time.

In-Hell-2003

The Hard Corps (2006)

Van Damme is summoned to assemble a team of bodyguards to protect a cocky boxer turned politician. He also gets involved with the boxers sister, who hired him in the first place. You know how the rest goes. But that said, this is a pretty good watch.

The-Hard-Corps-2006

Second In Command (2006)

Here he is left with the task of making the right calls to save the world when his superior gets killed. Much of his martial arts has been swapped for mega explosions, tanks and gunfire. This was a DVD only release.

Second-In-Command-2006

The Shepherd (2008)

What do you do when you have a group of ex-navy seals gone bad and are trafficking drugs from Mexico on to the states? Well, there is only one solution. You get a ranger from Texas, who so happenes to be Jean Claude Van Damme and you let him loose. That’s what you do.

The-Shepherd-2008

JCVD (2009)

I left this movie till the end of my marathon because its his latest movie to date and I think I made the right decision. In this movie, JCVD plays himself. The story is loosely based on his life and career. Personally I feel that this movie has the most substance of all his movies. It could be that half of it is in French and that kinda makes it a little more artsy or classy. Who knows. It just felt more mature and suited to how far he has come. There is also an underlying feeling that this is how JCVD feels. He might have accepted that he will never be an A list star, but you can’t help but feel sorry that he has tried his hardest only to achieve cult status amongst nerds and geeks.

JCVD2009

I’ve seen another Van Damme movie since this post. Check my review of Universal Soldier 3 – Regeneration – HERE!!!

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4 responses

21 06 2009
Heats68

18 Van Damme films in 2 weeks is a pretty amazing feat.
Somewhat scary as well. Are we even related?
BTW, i’ve really enjoyed following your blog – its interesting, funny and keeps me coming back. Don’t lose the momentum!

26 08 2009
JCVD_No_2

I was told in the late 80s/early 90s that I looked like JCVD. So I started watching his movies. Yeah, a certain resemblance. So here I am signing in. I see now his aging is accelerating a little more beyond mine. Maybe I should be happy!

26 12 2009
Paragraph Film Reviews

JCVD is a cracking movie, totally unexpected and head and shoulders above the rest. Nice review!

16 02 2010
REGENERATION « HansDC

[…] Click HERE for a min-review I did of JCVD films! […]

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